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Warning: The following is meant to be taken only as humor. I will not be held responsible for any injuries that may occur through use of this information. If you’re silly enough to do something like that, it’s entirely your own fault!

Ever have one of those days where your DMing sucked so much, you had to run away from your players or face horrendous mutilation? Or perhaps you’re being chased by a group of religious fanatics, bent on ending your blasphemy? Well, you’ll definitely need something to slow them down. Good thing we have dice!

Caltrops
The d4 may have limited use, but it is still useful. Wizards in particular need the d4, as that is what gives them their HP. It’s also needed to calculate damage for their daggers and magic missiles. But if you’re being chased down by someone, and need to get the heck out of there like any intelligent, pansy wizard, you’ll be better off throwing it to the ground.

No, not just one. All of them. Tens or even hundreds, if you have that many d4s (and you will, if you use something like Missile Storm). While the d4 isn’t particularly sharp, the point will always be pointing upwards. Anyone who steps on one is definitely going to be slowed down quite a bit, due to a sudden sharp pain in their foot. It may not pierce the skin, but it’s still going to hurt like hell!

Unfortunately, if your pursuers are wearing any decent protective footwear, the point of the d4 isn’t going to effect them as much. However, they may still trip up on them, and perhaps fall over. Then, in the case of an area being littered in d4s, upon impact with the ground, said pursuer may have a bunch of pointy d4s poking into them.

Speaking of tripping pursuers up…

Marbles
Yes, those round things you can buy at any kind of toy store. Just try to balance on one of those.

Now take a look at your d20s, d12s. They’re pretty decently rounded, even if not a perfect sphere. d10s and d8s can also work, even though they don’t have quite the round shape. And if you have any d100s, all the better!

Regardless, try balancing on them for any length of time. If you’re good, you can pull it off as long as you’re stationary. But try balancing on one while in a full run. More than likely, it’s going to roll, and thus cause you to go off balance. You could even end up landing flat on your face. Ouch!

I’m sure how you can see how these can be handy during a pursuit. Just throw a bunch of them to the ground, and cackle away as your pursuers trip and fall over them!

For added fun, you can mix it up with the d4s and round dice. Not only will your pursuers being getting tripped up, but they’ll also be feeling the blunt stabby-ness of the d4s. How’s that for a double-whammy?

However, I must warn you, the reader of one thing:
If you’re being chased by law enforcement of any kind, especially since they can easily follow you by helicopter, you’re going to be screwed…

By Bubba.