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Warning: The following is meant to be taken only as humor. I will not be held responsible for any injuries that may occur through use of this information. If you’re silly enough to do something like that, it’s entirely your own fault!

Dice. We D&D Nerds use them all the time. But it’s always for gaming, regardless as to whether or not it’s D&D. Have you ever wondered what other fun and wonderful things you can do with dice? Well, wonder no more!

Taking Care of Business
I’m sure you’ve had a bad player here and there, as many DMs around the world do. Rules Lawyers, Damage Monkies, players who do nothing, etc. They’re all a pain in the rear for us. Sometimes, they can tick us off so much that we just want to throw a random object at them.

Conveniently enough, we always have dice right within grasp.

The One-Shot Pelting
Throwing a single die at your problem player can not only cause minor bruising, but hopefully make him or her behave. However, sometimes one isn’t enough. You may need to pick up another, throw it at the problem player, and repeat as often as necessary to get conformance.

For the sake of accuracy, I suggest holding the die between your thumb and index finger. This allows you the precision to target vital organs, and have a better chance of actually hitting them. However, if you really don’t care about accuracy, then I suppose you could put the die into the palm of your hand, ball your hand around it, and throw it that way. Just be careful of hitting innocent bystanders.

The Spread-Shot
If you have more than one problem player, you’re going to be hard pressed if you need to pelt them with dice by going one at a time. This is an even greater problem if your whole group misbehaves. At this point, you’ll be better served by throwing multiple dice simultaneously.

Since you’re going to be holding multiple dice, you won’t be able to hold them between just your thumb and forefinger. You’ll be much better served by just taking a handful, and chucking it at them. True, you won’t have the accuracy of the one-shot, but you’ll be able to cover an area which will hopefully include all your targets. Unfortunately, this can have the habit of hitting innocent bystanders, so be very careful with this method!

No More Problem!
This is only the beginning of other interesting and amusing uses for dice. While this post is really meant to make you all chuckle a bit, I may post something that may actually be useful and/or safe. However, be careful of the Skittles.